Working with Foreigners

June 30, 2006 at 11:18 am (Relating to Work)

If only I can give you a look into my work life…

a simple day in the life, will make you understand why i am becoming more and more of a crude, snappy, angry person.

Now, it seems even the little things just “set me off” to go on a loud, angry, vehement tirade.  Am I proud of this?  DAMN FUCKING RIGHT I AM, MOTHER FUCKER.

So I get this e-mail today from some dude by the name of Zachabel Pavitran.  Lets start off there.  the dudes fuckin name is ZACHABEL PAVITRAN.  Disection: Zachabel sounds sort of like Zach morris (cool) and Tinkerbell (faggoty)  and since the emphasis is on the “abel” part, I’m gonna say its pretty damn gay.  Pavitran sounds like some form of Pakistani Transformer.  Transformers are cool, but imagine a Transformer with a pakistani accent.  Matter of fact, imagine the shittiness of having that accent, regardless of what you are.  It takes away from anything cool and/or hardcore.  “Beetch, vhat now, mother BEETCH!” <transforms, kills a deceptacon, transforms back into 24-hour kwiki mart>

So anyway, this dude e-mails a list of us, saying, and i quote, “this is to inform you, that I, Zachabel Pavitran, have taken over the job of…”

translation: I’m a big fucking herb who thinks im important, even though i work in fuckin hungary, have a totally shitty name, and get paid like $4 US Dollars an hour, and that is BIG TIME here, but i still suck.  And my name is fuckin Zachabel. 

Now, you might be thinking, “ok, one guy.  why such a big deal?”

well, I send a report out about 2 minutes ago, one of the people on the distribution list is Zoltan Dobszai (hungary as well.)   DO ALL THESE FUCKING HUNGARIANS HAVE RETARTED POWER RANGER NAMES?  seriously, the name itself sounds like he’s some fucking bad guy from the power rangers, that has fucking ninja sai’s for arms, and a GIANT FUCKING Z on his mask.

And he’s got an out-of-office mesage, saying, “Hello, sender, unfortunately I, Zoltan, am off today”
WHY DO I FEEL LIKE I’M E-MAILING BOB FUCKIN ROSS, THE PBS “PAINT WITH ME” GUY?? “now, painters, lets just throw a little bush over here with this green… and how about painting some happy trees, right along the side… see that?  Happy trees!”

and seriously, why must they say their names again?  do they think they are some kind of news anchor?  Did they get trained to speak/write the english language by Ron Fuckin Burgundy?  what the shit?

And dont even get me started on the indians…. my god the indians………

firstly, they have first names that are english, which means, they didnt want to get their first names BUTCHERED, so they started calling themselves “Kyle” and “Ralph”… HOW MANY INDIANS DO YOU KNOW NAMED RALPH??  Some of the indians were smart, and decided to shrink their first names to an inital… i.e.: Sharashcandra = S.    And their last names??? all their Last names are fucking 32 letters long, and only 3 are vowels….

dont believe me?  this is an actual name, as listed through my work’s contact list: Sarangabaniprakasam, B.

HOW THE FUCK DO YOU PRONOUNCE THIS?  No wonder he calls himself “Bill”